I need to talk to you about how you mistreated Tamar your daughter in-law. She married your oldest son Er. He was struck down by God. She was not to blame; it was his actions that caused his death. Yet she had not had a child by him when he died. By Levite law she was to marry his brother so that Er would still have a child through her. Yet Onan married her but refuse her the child that was her right to have. So then he lost his life.
Out of fear you sent her away to her family, with a promise that when your youngest son came of age they would marry. Yet you did not keep to your word. This was wrong. Three times she was kept from the blessing promised to her. When your wife died and you went to Timnah, to be with the sheep shearers. You met a woman there that you thought to be a temple prostitute. You went to bed with her and she conceived a child. You had left her with your ring, cord and staff with a promise to send her payment. She was not there when you did try to fulfill the promise. So you kept this to yourself, so that no one would know of what you had done.
When Tamar was found being pregnant you sentenced her to death. Yet the child she carried is yours. When she produced your belongings, you realized the wrong you had done to her. She never should have had to seek after you for the blessing that was rightfully hers. Even though you had tried, you did not keep the blessing from her because she went after it. What you had refused to give her I gave to her and I blessed her. You know her to be a righteous woman. So you made this right and acknowledged the wrong done to her and found her innocent. Do not again keep a blessing from her or anyone else, if it is a blessing that is to come through you, then give it. Do not think of the cost on your part. Think only of the joy your obedience will bring. Then you too will be blessed.
Your Lord and Almighty God
Genesis chapter 38