Waiting 5/23/2021

Well I am still in a waiting period. My procedure has been rescheduled for the second time. So I have another two weeks of waiting. I had joked with the woman handling my case that I could have given birth to a baby in the time I have been laid up, and off work.

For a person who is not patient this is frustrating. I am the type who wants to figure out the solution to the problem then get it done. Now my body has been in the care of others and I am not happy that the original doctor kept telling me the problem I was having with the swelling and discoloration in my arm was normal, to find out that it wasn’t and now I have these multiple procedures that need to be done. I would have liked these things to have been found out sooner and dealt with earlier. Unfortunately when others are in control of deciding what care you get things can go wrong and things can be delayed.

Yet through it all God has been with me. He has never left my side and He understands my frustration and He knows I don’t blame Him. Once upon a time I would have. I would have asked Him ‘What have I done wrong?’ or a long list of other things that would either blame myself or Him. Thankfully through life and a relationship with Jesus I have learned neither are true.

Waiting is not always pleasant and times are difficult. Life is not easy and even a bed of roses has it’s thorns, and needs to be fertilized. I plant seeds and there buried beneath the soil some grow and some don’t. They also don’t grow at the same time. Some you plant in fall to see bloom in the spring, and others just after winter to see them grow in the fall. They all have the waiting period. During our times of waiting we too grow and eventually bloom and produce fruit. I don’t know what will grow in me during through this time. I guess I just have to wait in see. Trust that God will see me through, and He will get me to the other side.

Numbers 9:8

Moses therefore said to them, “Wait, and I will listen to what the Lord will command concerning you.”

Reality (Fact or Fiction)

What is reality? Is it real? To be honest with you AI am not so sure. Reality T.V. is abundant, covering all areas of life, but to me it isn’t real. It is just a way for someone to make money off of people behaving badly. You don’t need to have talent to be famous these days. So what is real? Is reality real or a work of fiction? I look around the world today and see that people can say whatever they want and say it is true, even when it is definitely not. Fact, fiction, truth or lies, seem to have no true meaning anymore. I have looked back on my own life and wondered how much of it is true. Have I just been living in some dream or at times it is more likely to say a nightmare?  Once upon a time, you could read a newspaper and it would actually have real facts. Journalists were accountable for what they wrote; you could trust the majority of what you read. Now even the news isn’t real. It is opinions, and temper tantrums, or exploitation of people’s private lives that is none of our business.

So once again I ask the question what is real? There is only one answer for me, and that is Jesus is the Son of God, who is my Heavenly Father, Creator, the Great I Am. Jesus paid the price for my sins dying on a cross and rose on the third day to give me life. Jesus is my Lord and Savior. He has gone to prepare a place to take me home to. He has given me His Holy Spirit to be my Helper and Comforter. I have hope because of God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit that no matter how bad this life gets, and no matter what happens that I am going to be okay because He is never going to leave me and that His love I can always count on because it is the ONLY real thing to me in this world.

These are my thoughts. God bless and keep you, in Jesus name.

Love/Ai (personal thoughts)

As I have dived deeper into the message on love, I have looked to other languages to see how they say the word love. In Japanese the word love is ai meaning love and affection. It is not the word used for romance or passion. The most interesting thing I found while looking at how to write this word of love is that it takes thirteen strokes to write the kanji character Ai.

My attempt at writing this kanji.

That made me think of one of my favorite chapters in the Bible 1 Corinthians 13, the chapter on love. For those who are superstitious the number 13 is an unlucky number, but to me it is a number that spells love. When ever I question myself if a thought or action is right with God, I take it to this chapter. If it is what the words in this chapter says love is then I know I am in alignment with the Word of God and if it is not, then I know to take corrective actions. Thirteen strokes also made me think of the stripes Jesus took upon His body before He was crucified. Thirty nine stripes He took that day, okay that was definitely more than thirteen. He spent three days in the grave, rising on the third day. three times thirteen is thirty nine. These are just my thoughts, but ever since I realized that the number thirteen can be related to the Love of Jesus the kanji character really stuck out to me.

January 18,2021 / Thoughts

I have been thinking a lot lately about Mary the mother of Jesus. I have been working on a message on God’s love and how differently we love. I can’t imagine what it is like for a parent who has lost a child. I know many who have and I can be sympathetic to their pain by I do not personally know exactly what their pain feels like. Mary was there as her son Hung on a cross. The pain she felt I can not describe to you, but the helpless feeling that she could not stop her child from suffering had to be unbearable. To only be able to be there and not be able to comfort her child, yet hearing Him tell John that ‘This is your mother and tell her this is your son’, that even as He was about to die He was making provision for her care. She knew He loved her. Then being one in the group of women to first see Him after He rose from the grave, the joy she must have felt. I wonder what happened to her after this. I find no mention of her past this part. How did she live, what was her life like? To be the one woman who God chose to be the mother of His Son? The bond she shared with her son, the love she had, is something I want to have. To be that close to Him. Even though she was his mother, He was her Savior. He is Savior to us all who recieve Him. I want to love Him and have the connection she had. Well that is my thoughts for today.

January 14, 2021

It has now been a little over four months since I hurt my arm and shoulder at work. I still do not know when I will be able to return to work and waiting for approval to see an orthopedic doctor. It has been difficult not being able to work and still not able to drive. I feel like I have been grounded, and the lack of use of my prominent arm has made being home not being able to do the simplest task aggravating, but I am thankful that God has been with me through it all and He will remain by my side. Through the pain and sleepless nights I have had Him to count on. So today I just want to thank God for His faithful love and that no matter how I may feel I know He loves me.

Notes message of love/January 11, 2021

The lyrics ‘You don’t know what it’s like, to love somebody, the way I love you’, keep running through my head. It is like God is singing to me, telling me that He loves me and at the same time letting me know I do not understand the depth of His love.

I have always enjoyed how God has spoken to me over the years the closer I have come to knowing God. The closer I become to Him, the more I hear and see Him.(My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow Me. John 10:27)

As I have been focusing my studies on the scriptures about His love, the clearer His voice has become to me. It is not a new to me that no one can put God in a box. He is bigger and greater than we can imagine. Religion and traditions try to put Him into a box, but He is not found only in a building on Sunday morning, or by keeping religious traditions. All this has done is build walls that have separated us from knowing His love and who He truly is. I often think about the conversation between God and Moses, when God told Moses to go back to Egypt and lead God’s people to freedom.(Exodus chpt. 3)Moses asks God who he should say sent him, and God tells Moses to say ‘I Am That I Am has sent me to you’. Simple and straight to the point, ‘I Am’ is the One sending Moses to lead His people to freedom. The problem Moses faced was not with God but with the fact that the people including Pharaoh did not know God.

Unfortunately this is still a problem today. Even I do not know God the way I should. People may know His name, go to church and even serve without truly knowing Him. He speaks through His prophets, ministers, teachers, disciples, and Himself through His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Yet many do not listen. They have heard His Word spoken and read the scriptures, but like seeds on rocky ground the seeds of His Word did not get the chance to take root in their hearts, or like seeds that did get planted and did begin to grow were choked out by the weeds of this world. So either the seed does not get a chance to grow or it dies because the world and all of its’ problems smother it and it dies. Either way the seed does not grow and produce fruit.(Matt.13:20-22)

God has never stopped loving us. He still speaks to us today, and is waiting for us to listen to Him. His arms reaching out to us, wanting to embrace us. He longs for us to choose Him over the world, and to become one with Him. He wants you to know Him and to know His love, He is an open book waiting for you, inviting you to come in. Once you begin to know Him you will know His voice and hear Him speaking to you. It is time now for us to want to know Him on a personal life changing level. To want Him more than anything else in our lives. To let His love grow and flow through us. Then when people see us they see Him. Then His love can reach others through us.

Song/To Love Somebody

This song has been playing in my head for a couple of days now. The lyrics are really speaking to me. The verse ‘You don’t know what it’s like’, has been the main verse playing, and I can hear God singing to me about how we don’t know how much He loves us. Read the lyrics for yourself, and listen to the song and think about how much He loves you, and imagine He is singing to you.

“To Love Somebody”

There’s a light
A certain kind of light
That never shone on me
I want my life to be lived with you
Lived with you
There’s a way everybody say
To do each and every little thing
But what does it bring
If I ain’t got you, ain’t got? Hey babe

You don’t know what it’s like, baby
You don’t know what it’s like
To love somebody
To love somebody
The way I love you

In my brain
I see your face again
I know my frame of mind
You ain’t got to be so blind
And I’m blind, so so sorrily blind
I’m a man, can’t you see
What I am
I live and I breathe for you
But what good does it do
If I ain’t got you, ain’t got? Hey babe

You don’t know what it’s like, baby
You don’t know what it’s like
To love somebody
To love somebody
The way I love you

Oooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

You don’t know what it’s like, baby
You don’t know what it’s like
To love somebody
To love somebody
The way I love you

Noo noo no-no nooo nooooo

You don’t know what it’s like, baby
You don’t know what it’s like
To love somebody
To love somebody
The way I love you

Song / You give love a bad name

Are we giving love a bad name? We who are called Christians a representatives of Christ Jesus. the question I have to ask all of us, myself included is, ‘Are we giving love a bad name?’ When people see us do they see God’s love? Or do they just see someone who goes to church and speaks the language, but does not love? 1 Corinthians 13 tells us that no matter what we do if it is without love, we are just making noise. We are not here to put on an act or play a part but to live in Christ and share Him with all. Be good ambassadors and give Love a good name, because God is love and the only way some may ever see Him, is in us.

Message on love / thoughts Jan. 3, 2021

The more time I spend in scripture and prayer regarding this message, the more I feel like without knowing God we can not truly know love. At the same time you cannot put God into a box. He is eternal and greater than anything that we can imagine. So how do I put Him into a message that might last an hour, or maybe a series of messages? I can’t do that because I cannot contain God in a box or on a piece of paper. What can I do is to share God and who He is to me. How His love has transformed me and gotten me through the darkest moments of my life and how He can do the same for you.

Notes on message of love/ just a thought Dec 29, 2020

For the last few weeks I have been sharing my notes on preparing a message on love, that I have been working on helping a minister back in California. Sitting here today I have had many thoughts. First, here I am working with a person I had never met but God has brought us together to work on this project together. Which on its own shows how God’s love brings us together. Uniting strangers. The second is that it shows how there is no distance God’s love can’t reach. This reminds of how God’s love covers a multitude of sins. Preparing this message is also a reminder of the greatness of His love and how it is something that cannot be measured, and how His love overflows because there is nothing that can contain it. It is amazing, overwhelming and cannot be put into any container because it is bigger than all of us put together. At the same thing that joins us together. He is so wonderful and all consuming. His love is never ending. Isn’t that the greatest news you could hear? God bless you and your loved ones, with His love, peace and joy.