Things I Want….8/11/2017

Today I want to be able to feel the pain in my body without it effecting my mood.

This is not something new for me but my pain level over the last two weeks has been more than unbearable and it has worn me down to raw nerves. This how ever is no excuse for wrong behavior on mt part, and I also should not let it make me a less compassionate or loving person.

I read my Bible, I pray, and I sings songs of praise in worship which on any other day lifts my spirit, but in the last week I can really tell a difference in my attitude towards others. I am less patient, I tend to get offended easier than usual, and I am snapping at people I know God is forgiving and I know He did not cause my body t be in pain, but if this pain is the thorn in my flesh that I must bear then I want to do so with a spirit of joy and longsuffering. I want others to see the love of Jesus in spite of my pain.

Well it is time to get back to moving I have both packing and unpacking to do.

Knocked down again

Yesterday I wrote https://emotionalpeace.wordpress.com/2017/07/30/knocked-down-but-back-up-again/comment-page-1/#comment-2521 Knocked down but back up again. Well since then I have come down with a stomach bug, came home from getting a Sprite to calm my stomach only to spill it all over my living room floor. When I went to get a mop to clean it up I slipped and fell landing face first hurting my knee and wrist which was finally feeling better from a fall I took a couple of weeks ago when I got tripped by a dog.

So here is my question and thought for today –

Q: What do you do when you fall and no one is there to help you up?

To be honest when I fell I cried and yelled at first, but there was no one but me to clean up the spilled soda, so I had no choice but to make myself get up and mop up the mess. I then got some ice packs and and laid on the couch. One of my fears is that one day I will fall and not be able to make myself get up and since I live alone I wonder how long will I lay on the floor till help comes. For me it could be days since I do not get frequent visitors. My concern is not for me alone. I work as a home caregiver now and my job is to not only cook and clean for my clients but companionship and to be able to call for medical help if there is a need. I have had clients who have wonderful families who check on them on a regular basis but I have also had clients that have no one. These are the ones my heart has empathy for since I know what it is like to be alone and not in the greatest health. A friend of mine asked her pastor once if the church did anything for the the home bound people in the area and he replied no because if they wanted to hear the Word they would find a way to make it to church. She pointed out that if they made cds of the sermons these people would appreciate being able to hear the message and feel cared for. He did not agree. I often take a meal to any of my neighbors knowing how nice it is to just to be thought of or picked a flower and gave it to them just to brighten their day. It is not much and I am limited in what I can do but I do this because I know what it feels like to be not only alone but to feel lonely and unimportant at times. Yesterday my next door neighbor knowing I didn’t feel well brought me flowers from her flower bed and I am thankful for her thoughtfulness. Sometimes we will get knocked down and are not able to immediately get back up. It hurts and can be terrifying. We can lay there while fear overcomes us and we drown in loneliness. The other option is to breathe and take moment to clear your thoughts. Being afraid is not going to get you back up and you might be alone without physical help but Jesus is always with you even when you are fallen. It hurt like hell getting up after I fell and mopping up the mess did not make any part of me feel better, but this time I got up. I wasn’t happy and a few colorful words did escape my mouth as I cleaned up the mess and yes now I am resting giving my body a chance to heal up but tomorrow will come and I will get back up and do it allover again. Hopefully without falling or being sick. i have to hold on to hope and not give into fear and trust no matter how bad it gets God is always for me.

Proverbs 24:16
For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again, But the wicked stumble in time of calamity.

Knocked down but back up again

A while back I wrote about the tree that fell down in the playground at my apartment and how they had to cut the rest of it down.

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This beautiful tree lost a huge branch.

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So it had to be cut down because it was rotting on the inside.

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So to recap, large branch fell causing the tree to be cut down, chopped and ground to nothing. This tree is gone, or is it?

Here where a tree had fallen and was cut down to nothing is life shooting up out of the ground.

Many times in our lives we feel the pruning sheers of life cutting away at us. For some of us we feel like we are cut down to nothing and there is nothing left. Yet looking at this tree sprouting out up from the ground I am reminded that even when you seem to have lost it all and there is nothing left, do not give up and hold onto hope.

Job 14:7 For there is hope of a tree, if it be cut down, that it will sprout again, and that the tender branch thereof will not cease.

 

A Rose From My Mother

my mothers rose

Photography by Julie Sheppard

I took this picture after the memorial for my mother in Lake Havasu City, Arizona. She had planted this rose bush in her yard. After the service this beautiful rose stood out against the desert that surrounded it. At that time my heart was broken and my grief was overwhelming. I saw only a rose and knew that she had planted. Today this picture spoke to me. Her life had many harsh times and she survived and even bloomed.

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She was an amazing woman and she made sacrifices that cost her more than I had ever known for most of her life so that I could live and still be here today. Now as I look at this rose I see more than a rose. I am learning a lesson. Life can be harsh and cruel for many of us. Yet no matter where you are or what cruelty may surround you, love and life can still prevail.

I still miss my mom and always will but my thoughts of her bring me joy and she is still in my heart. She was a loving mother and a beautiful and hard working lady.

A Tree Falls

Okay it was not the whole tree that fell today but a large portion of tree did fall into our playground today. I actually heard a loud crack light lightning than a woosh as I watched it fall. I am thankful that all the children who live here in the apartments were not home but at school today. This however has lead me to a few thoughts. Here is the first of those.

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Thankfully when this large branch fell no one was hurt and no property damage was done.

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It missed the cars parked next to the playground.

No children were on the playground and it even missed the jungle gym and slide.

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As I thought about how thankful I was that no one was hurt I began to think about what happens when a brother or sister in Christ falls. Yes they are hurt and much damage is done to their life but how does their falling effect those who are near to them? Does anyone truly care or do they just receive judgment and condemnation from those who had said they loved them? Are they left alone to their destruction or does someone come and help pick them back up and begin to put back the pieces?

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Here you can see our handyman Sam cutting the branches and clearing the debris.

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This man came on his time off to help clear up a mess. It will take a couple or more days to finish the work but he will get it done because he cares about us and our safety.

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Sam is more than our handyman here, he is a brother in Christ Jesus. He is one if he sees someone down he comes and helps them up. He does not leave them lying on the ground. He sees a problem and he does not ignore it he does what he can to fix what needs fixing. Being a handyman suits him. Those  of us who know him count themselves blessed. He loves Jesus and the love of Christ flows through him.

So what if you or me falls who will be there to pick us up? If we fall how does this effect those who are close to us.? How many get hurt by our falling? Who will care? The unfortunate part of life is we will occasionally stumble and even fall. Sometimes we can keep the damage minimal and are the only ones who get hurt. To get back up we may need to be trimmed back. Cut some things loose so we can lift ourselves back up. Other times we will need help and God may send us someone like Sam. People who love Jesus and when they see someone down they go to them and help mend them and get them back on their feet and on the right path, like the parable Jesus told us about the Samaritan.

Parable of the good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) – Bible Gateway

25 On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

26 “What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?”

27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’[a]; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b]

28 “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”

29 But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

30 In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two denarii[c] and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

36 “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

37 The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

Footnotes:

  1. Luke 10:27 Deut. 6:5
  2. Luke 10:27 Lev. 19:18
  3. Luke 10:35 A denarius was the usual daily wage of a day laborer (see Matt. 20:2).

 

Just a thought March 24, 2017

A thought just came to me. There are plenty of things that happen in each of our lives that hurt us and even turn our lives upside down. Things that we cannot stop and are out of our control. Tragic things happen and we do not know why. This is an unfortunate part of life. We ask God, why and we do not seem to get an answer. We wonder if God is mad at us and some may even think that He doesn’t love them. This is not true. Bad things happen and there is no explanation that I can give you. I know however in the darkest moments when all is wrong He is there with us. He cries with us and grieves with us. He does love each of us more than any of us will ever know.

Yet what about the things that we make happen? We know not to do something yet we do it anyway. We get into relationships that turn our lives upside down and tear us apart. We make choices both good and, right or wrong. Then when things fall apart and we get hurt we blame the other person or situation we willingly got ourselves into.

A relationship that already has problems yet the couple chooses to get married believing they can make the other person change or having a child in a vain attempt to hold on to the other person. Then the relationship still gets worse and we then continue to blame the other not taking any accountability for our own actions and choices. We work against each other and fight. Tearing each other apart and blaming each other never fixes anything. Homes, communities and nations are torn apart because we choose to fight against each other and demand our own ways. Refusing to listen or work with each other.We are right and the other is wrong. Proud and arrogant is what we have become. We lack responsibility and accountability. Matthew 7:5 teaches an important lesson Look at ourselves and actions and fix what is wrong with our own selves. Then we can be better help each other.

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Photography by Julie Sheppard edited with paint.

I cannot honestly blame all my pain and suffering on other and definitely not God. I am responsible for my own choices and actions. Yes I have been abused and this I am not to be blamed for, but what I did in reaction to the abuse is my responsibility.

 

QUESTION; Was there any protests when Obama was first elected or any other President?

There is so much division in this country I call my home. Pro-Trump verse anti-Trump. Marches in protest all across the country and even families and people who were once friends are divided. I have never known a President to be elected by a 100% unanimous vote. We start off with many candidates who run for the office and then it usually gets whittled down to just two in the last stretch of the election. One wins the other one looses. Not everyone is happy. Yet we are called the United States, that even though we are different and have different opinions as a nation we once stood together. We do not need a foreign enemy to do us harm any more because we are harming each other every day with hatred and fighting.

So I have a couple of questions;

Since Abraham Lincoln and the Civil War has there been protests and division like there is today?

Was there any other President who was immediately protested and marched against after winning an election for their first term? (Yes I know there were protests when Obama was re-elected but I am talking about first term before they had even been in office for more than a few months)

I know I probably stirred up a hornets nest but the question has been on my mind for a few weeks and I googled protests against Presidents and only came up with Trump and then Obama during his second term and not his first.