Self Portrait/ A lesson in how we see ourselves

I originally wrote this lesson back in 2015 and I thought it was a good time to share it again with a little editing, since it was originally done for a women’s Bible study but since then others have asked if they could use it with the men in their church as well.

How we can see ourselves and how God our Heavenly Father can be two very different pictures.

Self Portraits Lesson

Self Portraits / Julie Sheppard

A lesson on how we view ourselves and how God in His Love and Word can transform us. How we see ourselves, and how others see us can be completely different. Then there is how God our Heavenly Father and our Creator sees us. How do these views reflect the other is what this is part of what this lesson teaches.

Taking a good luck at ourselves is not easy for most of us. We can look into a mirror and see our reflection but this is not all that we are. God created each one of us individually and He knows our hearts, our thoughts, and everything else about us. He created each of us with a purpose. We are beautifully and wonderfully made. Each one of us is His masterpiece. Most of us do not see this though. I admit that I do not see what God sees, but through this study, I hope we will have our eyes opened, and that we see who and what were created to be. We are His daughters and His sons. We are His chosen, and we are His bride.  We do not usually see ourselves in the best light. It is time that we see ourselves in the Light of Jesus, which He shines favorably upon us.

The worlds view of women has taught us that we to look a certain way be seen as beautiful. Men are supposed to be rugged and strong to be considered men. TV shows, movies, magazines, and fashion has reinforced this view into our own way of thinking. We are not only guilty of putting each other’s down, we also put ourselves down. If a person doesn’t fit our view of what we think they should be or act, we often criticize gossip and make jokes at the others expense. We may be nice to their face, but slander them behind their back. Let us break this terrible behavior. We are called to love each other. The Word even tells us to go a step further, and to love our enemy! But how can we love, if we do not love ourselves? It is okay to love yourself, because God created us in His love, to be loved.

Will you now take the time and see who you are created to be. In the first part of this four part lesson, we will make a self portrait of ourselves. You do not have to be an artist to do this. This exercise is to be fun and an opportunity to be creative. This is not a pass or fail exercise. Paints, pens, pencils and crayons are usual art supplies, there is also pictures from magazines etc… that you can make a collage. This is an opportunity to show off your creativity, and to take a look at ourselves in a new way. When you have completed your portrait take some thought and think of a scripture(s) or a person in the Bible you can relate your portrait to. You can write as many scriptures as you would like. One thing if you want to get something more than an arts and crafts lesson. I do hope you will be honest with yourself as you do these lessons so that you can really get something from them.

Lesson one

Draw, paint, or make a collage of how you see yourself. Remember to be honest to yourself in this portrait and the others in the following lesson. This may be the hardest of the lessons. No matter how you see yourself it is okay. I am hoping by the end of these lessons that you will see yourself in a new light. When you are done with this portrait, see if you can find any scriptures to go with it. Most Bible studies or life groups meet once a week, so I suggest that in the first week you create your portraits, and follow up the next week by sharing them and any scriptures in a loving a supportive way with each other. This should be done with each portrait making this lesson eight weeks long if to get the most out of this lesson.

Example

In this first picture, I see myself alone in the darkness even though I know God is there.

Isaiah 49:14 But Zion said, “The Lord has forsaken me, And the Lord has forgotten me.”

The second is a collage.

Lesson two

The second lesson is not going to be much different than the first lesson except this portrait will be one to portray how we think the world sees us as. We may say we do not care about what others think of us, but if we are honest with ourselves we do care. Sometimes this can cause  our view of ourselves to diminish. This can keep us from doing what God has called us to do, because we are afraid of being judged, this can also cause us to harshly judge others out of this fear. (Strike first) So this lesson is to get us beyond that fear of being judged and criticized. Once your portrait for this lesson is done, think of someone in the Bibles who makes you think of this portrait. Then ask yourself does their story reflect how you feel you are seen by others? Discuss with another if they see you as this portrait or not.

Lesson three

The third part of our lesson is to do a portrait of one of someone else in your group. Names will be put into a bag and each one of us will pick a name from this bag. This is not an easy exercise, because of how we may feel that we are viewed.  Yet one rule to this lesson is we will not be tearing each other down. This is a lesson in how we can build each other up. To show the other person the beauty, strength and value that they may not see in themselves.  Here we will also learn some truth about ourselves we didn’t know about before. This will also reinforce that we do not need to fear judgment and criticism. Just as in the previous lessons choose a scripture or person in the Bible who reflects this portrait. If you are not sure of what this portrait should look like pray and let God’s Holy Spirit guide you. You may even choose you scripture or biblical person first. Remember to build your sister or brother up. Make sure to stay away from all things negative.  Remember the saying a picture can speak a thousand words? So let us watch our words. Speak LIFE! When you have completed this portrait and added the scriptures or person from the Bible present it to the person you made this portrait of. In this you will both be blessed. The following week discuss the reason for your choices in making this portrait, the scriptures or person from the Bible that made you think of this person. Then ask the person if they can now see themselves in this way.

Lesson four;

The best lesson is for last. This portrait is how God our Father sees us. His view of us is so much better than what we see ourselves as.  It is time to see ourselves through His loving eyes. Allowing Him to open up our eyes to see the beauty of His creation. Now in this lesson you should have no trouble finding scriptures detailing how He sees us. Not only should this lesson help us to see the beauty in ourselves but in each other. Then we can learn to be more encouraging, lest critical, and to let go of our fears. Learning to see ourselves through His loving eyes. Now complete your last portrait. Once you are done let us discuss how has your view of yourself changed through these lessons? Do you see yourself as being loved? Do you see how beautiful you are? Do you see your value? Do you see how important you are?

I only included a couple of examples to help give you ideas. If you choose to do this study please let me know. I would love to see your portraits  and read what you have learned and if there are any lessons you learned that you would share to help another. I am hoping that we all can learn to see our true value.

Shadow Of Who I Was

A Shadow Of Who I Was

From Scars to Beauty Marks

I wrote this post back in 2015

From Scars to Beauty Marks

As I look at the scars on my body I realize things are not always what they look like. Yes the scars are real, from the burn scar on my wrist which originally was done to my hand as a child to the other scars both seen and unseen. To the world they look ugly and even to me for most of my life. It was only recently that I can look at these scars and see them as beauty marks. Why beauty marks? Well, because what caused these scars were painful events in my life. Yet they are what make me the woman I am today.

The first two pictures are of the same scar. When I was around four years old almost five I received a cigarette burn on my right hand. Over the years while I grew the scar moved as I grew and is now on my wrist. The fact it resides on my wrist shows how much I grew. So this got me thinking.

What things look like is not always how they were perceived. You look at a scar and most would say they are ugly, some when bad enough are looked at as grotesque. Most of the scars on my own body are small and most probably do not notice them. A scar in the shape of a circle on my wrist is probably the most noticeable. A small scar from a knife a little further up the inside of my forearm is probably the least noticeable. I can continue to list the other scars which decorate my body, and then there are the unseen scars that no one can see because they are not visible to the eye. These are the scars left by the abuse that comes before the punches, the burns, the broken bones etc… These are scars that were left on my heart and mind. There are only two who know their true depth are me and my Savior Jesus.

It has taken most of my adult life to admit that I had these scars. I could write in detail all the events that left these scars, but today I choose to direct my focus on how Jesus has healed me and taken these scars and turned them into beauty marks. You see He too has scars on His body. He allowed Himself to be nailed to a cross so that I would be forgiven, healed, redeemed, and to know what ever pain I might have suffered He felt a pain much greater than mine. He did this all so that I would know that He loved me. His love and the life He gave for me has made me new. I am not who I used to be. I am not a punching bag, and I am not a victim. Through Him I have the victory because He gave it to me. He has caused me to grow in His love and to have hope and joy, even when the days are cold and stormy; I know I am not alone. Everything is okay. These marks are little maps that show how much He has changed me. I hope when you look into the mirror you will see all the beauty He sees when He looks at you.

Since I first wrote this post I have continued to grow and heal. I am not who I was and not yet who I will be. God is continuing to transform me. The pain I have survived did not kill me by the grace of God, but like a sword as it is being forged I have been through the fire and HE went through it with me every time. He is refining me and molding me into a new image and when HE is done with me, I will want to look in the mirror and see the beauty HE has created.

Art by Julie Sheppard aka Reiko Chinen

If interested in purchasing prints contact me by emailing me including in subject line prints for sell:

sheppaja@yahoo.com

QUESTION? Matthew 6:33

Matthew 6:33 ESV

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

What does this verse mean to you? There are no wrong answers.

I will share what it means to me in my next post and will share your answers if you would like me to.

Fire and trials

Thanks to all of you who have read my posts, kept me in your prayers and offered words of encouragement and comfort. A couple of the recent comments had reminded me of a word God had given to me some years ago.

A sword when formed the materials chosen are put through the fire, stretched, folded, and hammered. This is done over and over until the blade is formed. The more the blade is folded the stronger it becomes. The part I am focused on today is the fire which inspired by both a recent painting I had posted, ‘Going through the fire’, and a current one that I have been working on for a client, ‘Risen’. Risen is not ye finished and neither are the rest of us. I like to say we are a work in progress and God is not done with us yet. Both paintings represent fire.

Risen unfinished by Julie Sheppard

Through the Fire by Julie Sheppard

First thought of fire you think of destruction. Homes and forests burned to the ground. Getting burned. Yet fire is not just destructive. You cook with fire. Create with it. Fire can be scary but look at Daniel’s friends Shadrach, Meshach and Abed Nego. They refused to bow down to and idol and were thrown into a fiery furnace. They did not burn and they came out not even smelling of smoke. Then think of the Holy Spirit Fire. We grow when we go through the fire. We are refined. We are made stronger. In the painting immediately above I had explained in a previous post. The current painting which is unfinished I will tell it’s story when it is finished. Clay pots are put into kilns and baked. God is referred to as The Potter and we are His clay, to be molded and shaped into vessel He can use. This also means to be made solid we too must go through the fire. I am not sure how long it is going to take for me to finish my current painting but I will post it when it is finished.

Remember His fire will not harm you but make you stronger!

Through The Fire

I used to have this nightmare that terrified me years ago, where I was surrounded by fire, covered in blood, and being attacked by something I could not see. Recently God revealed to me that it was not a nightmare, which I would argue until He gave me understanding. He told me that even though I was surrounded by fire I was not being burned. The blood that covered me was not my own, but His Son’s blood which was protecting me. Even though I was being attacked, that I did not die, but stood firm. That the fire kept the enemy from destroying me, and that it was His Spirit that surrounded me. This inspired this painting.

Through The Fire by Julie Sheppard

Which I hope inspires hope for those who are going through their own fiery trials, or nightmares.

Notes message of love/January 11, 2021

The lyrics ‘You don’t know what it’s like, to love somebody, the way I love you’, keep running through my head. It is like God is singing to me, telling me that He loves me and at the same time letting me know I do not understand the depth of His love.

I have always enjoyed how God has spoken to me over the years the closer I have come to knowing God. The closer I become to Him, the more I hear and see Him.(My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow Me. John 10:27)

As I have been focusing my studies on the scriptures about His love, the clearer His voice has become to me. It is not a new to me that no one can put God in a box. He is bigger and greater than we can imagine. Religion and traditions try to put Him into a box, but He is not found only in a building on Sunday morning, or by keeping religious traditions. All this has done is build walls that have separated us from knowing His love and who He truly is. I often think about the conversation between God and Moses, when God told Moses to go back to Egypt and lead God’s people to freedom.(Exodus chpt. 3)Moses asks God who he should say sent him, and God tells Moses to say ‘I Am That I Am has sent me to you’. Simple and straight to the point, ‘I Am’ is the One sending Moses to lead His people to freedom. The problem Moses faced was not with God but with the fact that the people including Pharaoh did not know God.

Unfortunately this is still a problem today. Even I do not know God the way I should. People may know His name, go to church and even serve without truly knowing Him. He speaks through His prophets, ministers, teachers, disciples, and Himself through His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Yet many do not listen. They have heard His Word spoken and read the scriptures, but like seeds on rocky ground the seeds of His Word did not get the chance to take root in their hearts, or like seeds that did get planted and did begin to grow were choked out by the weeds of this world. So either the seed does not get a chance to grow or it dies because the world and all of its’ problems smother it and it dies. Either way the seed does not grow and produce fruit.(Matt.13:20-22)

God has never stopped loving us. He still speaks to us today, and is waiting for us to listen to Him. His arms reaching out to us, wanting to embrace us. He longs for us to choose Him over the world, and to become one with Him. He wants you to know Him and to know His love, He is an open book waiting for you, inviting you to come in. Once you begin to know Him you will know His voice and hear Him speaking to you. It is time now for us to want to know Him on a personal life changing level. To want Him more than anything else in our lives. To let His love grow and flow through us. Then when people see us they see Him. Then His love can reach others through us.

Notes on message on love /Jan 6, 2021

1 John 4:19 We love because He first loved us.(ESV)

We are only capable of love because God loved us first. Without God there is no love. Desire, affection, and passion are often used to describe love, but when you read 1 Corinthians 13 these words are not found in what God says love is. Those are only feelings, and they change with the wind and the waves. They are not stable, and you cannot build on them. They can make you feel good, but then they fade and can turn into pain. Pain turns into resentment, bitterness and hate, which then turn into actions that hurt others and the damage continues.

So then how can we love, if our knowledge of love is from the world and not God? My answer is that we can’t. Just because we call something love, does not make it love. we have all heard of knock off designs. They look like the original but they cost less. Just because someone put a label on it saying it was an original but they got you a deal so it cost less. Ye it is nothing more than an imitation of the real thing. Yet you got a deal right? It barely cost you half of the cost of the real thing, but you have a poor quality imitation of the real thing. God’s love number one is real, and number two it cost Him everything. Yet there are a lot of imposters in the world all around us. They say and do things in the name of God but they do not have His love, and these are the ones Jesus tells them to go/depart(Matthew 7:23/Luke13:27) His love when it gets deep down in you like a seed planted in good soil. It grows and produces His fruit. You can see the changes in a person who has the Love of God in them. Love changes a person. It may look like the change starts on the outward appearance, but it is on the inside where the real change begins.

Questions:

Will you allow God today to plant His love in you?

Will you allow His love to grow in you? Will you allow His love to change you?

Will you allow His love to be seen?

Call To Prayer / Who are you listening to?

We pray to God, and we make our requests, petitions for provision, protection, healing, and the list goes on. Then we wait to hear His answer. Yet, are we listening to God, when it comes to the answer? Do we hear His answer and because we do not like it, so we go to a friend, a minister, a teacher, etc… looking for the answer we want to hear? Maybe we grow impatient because the answer does not come through in our timing and someone comes with an answer but it is not from God, but it sounds nice so we believe it is.

It feels like my life has been nothing but a battlefield at times. I have heard people tell me all the wrong I must be doing for God to be punishing me, and that my faith must be weak because if it was stronger I would have been healed already, etc… These are just a couple of examples of voices I had listened to in the past. Well meaning people who thought they were helping, but were not. Listening to them I doubted myself and I doubted God, and this kept the embers of anger burning within me. Angry with the world, and angry with myself, and even angry with God. I learned with time that God was not punishing me, and the He forgave me and loves me. He was not the author of my pain and suffering. My faith had not been weak but actually growing stronger with each trial I faced, because I did not walk away but clung to Him with all of my life. I may stumble but I get back up, and what ever I have done in my past is in the past, He does not hold it against me, but it can be used to teach others of His amazing love.

Recently a friend and I prayed over my current situation, and including the request for a new job that would be better than my current one, from which I am on leave because of a workplace injury, which has limited my use of my right arm. The very next morning I received a call, which I thought was to confirm my Dr. appointment, but was for a job interview. I was so happy to get called for an interview, I thought it had been an answer to prayer. The door to that job was immediately shut, which before would have depressed me, but this time I felt peace. I heard Him tell me that He has better in store for me, and that right now I need to just rest and be healed. When I told my friend that I did not get the job she had been so sure the enemy had stolen it from me. God then gave me this to share with her, ‘Not everything that looks like a blessing is a blessing or even from Him. Curses can be disguised as a blessing, just like some blessings do not look like a blessing at first. I could have been discouraged when the door to this job closed, but the peace He gave me let me know that it was for my best. So the answer was no to it, but it was also that He has better, I just need to wait and recover from my recent injury.

We may not always like what He has to say to us. If we are stubborn and dismiss what He is saying we will not have peace. He will always do right by you, and never do anything to harm you, nor will he give you anything that will harm you. We do have to choose to listen to Him if we want to receive what He has for us.

God bless and protect you, in Jesus name, amen.

WORDS / If you don’t have anything nice to say…

Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue,
And those who love it will eat its fruit.

One thing told to me when I was growing up was, ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say then keep your mouth shut.’ I know this phrase is also said in other terms, but they all boil down to this message; Be careful what you speak, the damage your words can do cannot be undone.

People today are so quick to slander each other for such a wide variety of reasons, I won’t bother to start that list. I will talk today of my own self. As some of you may have noticed I have not been posting here for a while. This past year has thrown some painful pitches my way, and some of my earlier posts I talked about how pain can effect us. For me one thing it leads me to is anger, and not a righteous anger. It is an anger that can lead to mass destruction. I can do more damage with my tongue than with my fist.

So I had slowly been isolating myself, which is a terrible thing to do. Yet fear of what I would do in my anger helped me to justify becoming a hermit again. Since I had not had very many nice things to say, I just started shutting myself away from the world. Yet that did not keep me from thinking words of hate and destruction which in other words are curses. No sooner had I thought them or said them aloud, even though I am home alone, I knew that what I was doing was wrong and would have to quickly repent. Yet the thoughts and words still lingered in my mind.

So I have been having this inner battle, that if you saw me in person you would not see this struggle. I do know how to put on the right mask when necessary. I try hard to keep my dark battles to myself and only let those who I feel I truly can trust know of these battles. Which I thank God for blessing me with these close friends who love me unconditionally and do not condemn me when I falter, and so I can confide in them.

Yet this struggle has not left me blind to the fact that I how can I be of help to others if I am home alone licking my wounds, and living in fear? It is out in the fields where the laborers should be, and I have been hiding in my own little cave like David hiding from Saul, or Elijah hiding from Jezebel. Like Elijah hiding in his cave, God has reminded me that I need to get back out there and do what he has called me to do, and not stay hidden in the safety of my home. Which in all honesty is not so safe when you have to battle your personal demons alone because you have hidden yourself.

One assignment He had given me a while back, that I had put off on the back burner so to speak is to unite His body in prayer. I had one excuse after another pop up as either obstacles or rejection to this idea, for various reasons. Yet I have heard Him say it is not over yet, so get back up and keep trying. Now the most current obstacle I have faced is organizing a public gathering for people to gather in prayer because the current problems with the Covid 19. I was reminded that I still have a way to unite my brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus in prayer here, and that this would actually reach more people, than if I had organized a prayer meeting for the area in which I live.

Our prayers are to include more than just our family, friends, church, and needs of those we are personally connected to, but to cover this earth with prayer, and for every need to be met and most important, for His will to be done. My next blog will speak more of this assignment and will include how I started making prayer boards.

I hope you will join me in this assignment, and if there are any prayer requests for anyone, ministry organizations, etc… please share those requests here and we can pray together.

P.S. I am sorry that this post started on one topic and led to another, but prayers are words that can do such good, and that is what I have to get back to. Speaking words of life.